Now, FOUR Years in China

In the interest of at least posting *something* occasionally, I’m going to use a “digest” version.

How busy am I?
I saw Maddy last Sunday night and didn’t see her until Friday. Last week we had a filmmaker from LA come to do a promotional documentary of the school I’m working at. Each night, I made sure he made it to some dinners and social activities. I’m also managing a very big project out of the downtown office whereby I have to hold meetings on Monday and Friday at 5 pm. After the meetings I attend dinners with the customer and team from the office. These weren’t excessively late nights. I was home at ~ midnight but with the stress of being “on” combined with the cumulative effects of the the previous nights, I was wiped out.

Out every night
I think i set a record this week for participating in nightlife activities and have sympathy for rock stars…(not really), but I do have a sense of what it would be like to party every night. Friday night ended up being a rather late one involving more drinking than I normally do. On Saturday morning, Maddy and I went on a girl scout hiking trip to the mountains only to return, host appetizers for other parents while the kids trick-or-treated followed by another night out for a halloween party in the city.

Saturday Night - Best Halloween Party EVER!!!
I really wanted to decline the invitation on Saturday because I was a walking zombie after this past week’s activities and a hike through the mountains didn’t make me any less fatigued. The night started out with me dressing up in my costume and meeting some friends in the city at a house party followed by warehouse party in the trendy 798 (chi jiu ba) warehouse art district. This party was absolutely phenomenal with a collective vibe thats hard to explain with words. Maybe it was the excellent costumes and playful feel of it but I’ve never seen so many barriers come down between various nationalities in one place. Combine that with awesome music and a few Red Bull cocktails and my fatigue disappeared. Congratulations to the promoters of this event…they nailed it.

Sunday…finally
Today was a beautiful day and the three of us of us went into town so I could have a final fitting of a tux I’m having made for the American Marine Ball next week. (note: having a custom tux and shirt made costs less than renting one in the US). Afterwards, we went to really nice Brazilian restaurant called Alameda in the Na Li alley in Sanlitun (a popular nightlife and shopping district) for a tasty lunch. It was really great to have some good ‘ol fashioned family time again.

Imagine logging into your online investment portfolio one morning only to find your life-savings completely gone. How do you readjust your expectations? How does this impact your kids’ education? How does this impact a daughter’s wedding? How does this impact your dreams of traveling / joining a country club / buying a boat / etc. during your retirement? How will you present this news to your spouse and manage her expectations?

Don’t read any more of this for 20 seconds while you ponder yourself in this situation.

You might think “so this is what a lifetime of work amounted to…hmmm” Depressing right?

The victims, who will not be able to retire or enjoy their golden years will statistically live less years than those who enjoy a stress-free retirement, spend time with family and pursue leisure and exercise. I’m sorry, but these guys are no better than any street criminal who mugs an elderly person and pistol whips them onto a life support machine. It may not be as graphic or immediate, but the end results are the same.

These Enron guys are more deserving of life sentences than those who commit a crime against an individual. There’s been some commentary about being sympathetic to Kenneth Lay…I say BS. You could fill an oil tanker with the victims’ collective stress, sadness, and pain that these criminals caused. Worst of all is the loss of these people’s hope and optimism towards the future.

As Americans, I think many of us have become so “aspirational” that we tend to empathize with the wealthy/famous/powerful as a means of making ourselves feel like we are peers in that club. Or, if it is a perceived as a club, then maybe we simply want to ensure that they don’t cut any membership privileges by the time we can afford to join.

We make choices about how we walk down a dark street. Can we tell which company is akin to a well-lit street? Can we carry something to protect ourselves? The US government implemented the Sarbanes-Oxley regulations which is akin to installing street lamps. But in the world of white-collar crime, we really can’t protect ourselves when the crime commences. This is where we need to alter a reasonable person’s motivation for committing such a crime through much harsher punishments. It is my hope that Skilling gets the maximum sentence and loses all of his $61M. My real hope would be for him to serve time in a Texas prison with muggers, carjackers, and other common somewhat violent criminals who appreciate men with soft hands like Jeff.

But sadly, he’s going to emerge from jail around retirement age, pull a few million out of his offshore account, buy a house in Italy, buy a boat, and have a pleasant retirement. Bastard.

Apologies to everyone who enjoy following this site. I’ve been extremely busy in the past months with a number of things and complicated by the fact that I had to be a single-dad without a car for a while. Here’s the story…

Summer Crunch
My last entry was in late May and from that point, I was sucked into a vortex of extreme busyness. When Lisa and Maddy left on June 17, I kicked it into Red Bull overdrive and pulled 80 hour work weeks with a couple all-nighters to complete some big projects prior to my return to the US on July 4 to work at a tradeshow, meet with US customers, and present justification/outcomes of this whole gig to the VPs. The pressure was overwhelming. I was able get about 1.5 weeks in Atlanta which was nice but I was focused on the meetings which would determine the renewal of my contract here. The meetings went well.

Prior to my arrival, Lisa ruptured a disk and severely herniated another. Within 3 weeks, she was in and out of surgery 2 days before I had to go to to California for meetings and then back to China. We did some shuffling with United Airlines to put Lisa on a flight during the first week in Sept. and moved Maddy’s flight up so she could travel with another family from Beijing.

Single Dad in Beijing
It actually worked fairly well. My mom flew to Atlanta, picked up Maddy and took her to Chicago for a couple days of fun in the city before she rendezvous her friends at O’Hare.

This time is the busiest time of year for a school’s IT department and the hours are long. Throw in a failed mail server and it gets really fun. Thankfully, Maddy was able to go home with some friends after school and I would pick her up at dinner time. I have a newfound appreciation for single parents.

Lisa returned in the first week of Sept and is still in a bit of pain with weakness in the legs. She does her prescribed physical therapy every day and is slowly getting better.

Temporarily Carless
To complicate things, I had a fender-bender on the airport expressway while coming home from dinner with Maddy. It was quite scary but when it was all done, I realized that it’s much easier to have an accident here than in the US. First of all, it’s not a litigious society yet and the post-wreck interaction is more gentlemanly. It also helps that blame is decided by the police for even the slightest accidents.

The key to having a car here is having a membership with a car club similar to AAA but more tailored to foreigners. The minute I bumped into the guy, I called the club and got out and waited. The representatives of the club handled the police, the towing, the paperwork, all insurance issues, interactions with the other driver and even repaired my car. It was quite amazing. It reminded my of the Trunk Monkey commercials where a press of the button makes all your troubles go away.

The downside of the accident was that insurance reimburses the faulty party after they pay for the other person’s car repair and it takes a month to get the money back. In other words, I had to dip into my savings for a big wad of cash that I won’t see for a while. Luckily it doesn’t cost a lot to repair a car. Mine was fixed within 2 weeks and it runs better than it did before and I was very impressed with the quality of the repair. It only took 1 return trip to fix some minor details.

Taxes
As an expat, you have a different set of rules for taxes…some good, others not. You qualify for an automatic extension until June 15 and can have a free extension until October 15. But note that you have to qualify as an expat by various tests of how long you have been here etc and being here half a year doesn’t really work. If you arrive in the summer, don’t count on the full expat-tax benefits and make sure you file by April 15. I had an extension until Oct from another tax person and it worked out fine but my new accountant put the fear of G*d in me that if I owed something, I wouldn’t be so lucky. Lesson learned. I could write an entire document on taxes and probably should.

Overall
Life here is fine…even pretty good. It’s starting to feel more like a home as I make repeat trips down the same roads and interact with the locals more. That’s one reason it’s so hard to blog…nothing is much different than living the suburbs of the US. The differences don’t seem so big anymore. Lisa, on the other hand, is still having a hard time with her perceptions of China and letting the little things bother her. We’ll keep our fingers crossed that she finds her groove, but until then, I think she’s counting down the days just like the other “tai tais” who she initially thought were so pathetic to not embrace the experience. It’s harder than it looks and certain personalities do better here.

This past week was the national holiday and instead of traveling, we opted to stay here so I could work on the servers without the risk of annoying students and teachers. We had a few days of beautiful weather. I got lots of work done and enjoyed later nights out with some friends. I’m beginning to collect some new blog material with visits to karaoke bars and Russian restaurants with strange stage shows. Despite the pollution and personal hygiene habits of some locals, this is becoming way more enjoyable this year.